Let's see...what should I write about today? I know, how about the time my son pulled the fire alarm at Walmart...that was eventful and funny but I may not want to include the colorful metaphors I used with him after-the-fact! How about the time my siblings and I tried to recreate The Ringling Brothers Circus in our backyard using bare root trees and a rope...intriguing and resourceful but I'd have to follow up with the injuries sustained from said event and that won't dovetail well with a smooth ending! Maybe I should write something more heart-warming this time...it's got to be a topic that's timeless and somehow include something humorous that will resonate with all readers...hmmmm...must start Nutshell (heartbeat) ...must start Nutshell (louder heartbeat)...must start Nutshell (loudest heartbeat)....
HOW THE (expletive) DID MY MOTHER COME UP WITH SOMETHING CLEVER, LOVELY OR FUNNY TO WRITE ABOUT FIVE DAYS A WEEK FOR 20+ YEARS???????
You know those people you meet in life who just have a special talent and no matter how hard you practice you will never reach the genius that they have attained, naturally. I have a friend like that...I practiced singing everyday...scales and breathing techniques until I was (literally) blue in the face...but...No One could match the silvery, ethereal-produced pitches that spiraled from the throat of my friend Christi. At seventeen, she had developed lungs that, I swear, are second only to those of Michael Phelps! I sat in as much amazement at her voice then, as I am now, trying to write blogs on my Mother's behalf. Her writing was so full of warmth and genius and apparently, very innate. What took my Mom a happy, few minutes of easy composition....take me hours of nail-biting, grammar-correcting, hair-pulling...STRESS! I am motivated to compose as it is therapeutic for me to pen the things that flow from my broken heart in hopes that my Mom will, somehow, know of what I'm writing. My Mom, on the other hand, wrote because she LOVED writing and she was so good at it!
My Mom had a lengthy career in writing....it actually started when she was quite young. Most recently, she wrote for The Idaho Press Tribune as "Ida Chatter." Prior to that she was the "Domestic Goddess" at The Shelley Pioneer and before that...well, she just happened to be the recipient of the S.E. Needham's Jewelry prize for her entry in the Logan Herald Journal Creative Writing Contest. The Logan Herald Journal announced it's forthcoming creative writing contest throughout all Cache Valley in the paper itself. The only stipulation...it had to be an original piece of work...whether poetry or prose! The participants were also advised that the judging panel would be made up entirely of the journalists who penned the Logan Herald Journal. The article announcing the creative writing contest also indicated that the winning entry would be spotlighted in the paper and the author would receive a beautiful set of S.E. Needham's gold-plated cuff links as the prize of the Creative Writing Contest! My Mom was immediately intrigued as she had her heart set on being recognized as a writer AND she desperately loved the idea of giving such a beautiful gift to her hardworking, financially-strained, father!
When my Mother announced the information of the contest to her family, they cautioned her not to get her hopes up. They realized that this contest would include entries from all ages and stages of life and that my Mother, being a very young tween, would have as much hope of winning as...well....the Denver Bronco's at the most recent Super Bowl (I can't believe I just said that! Back you animals...back...I truly love Peyton Manning!) Ahem...Back to my story...my Mom was so determined and so focused that she immediately penned a pretty poem then sat her entire family down for a listen. As the town crier of old, my Mom read out her enlightened entry and when she got to the following phrasing, she was devastated by her family's loud laughter:
"...The wind it blew, the waves grew higher. I thought I could run, but I was a liar!"
Obviously this stanza is funnier having been taken out of context of the entirety of the poem. My Aunt, who lovingly and recently retold this story to me, tried, even now, to remember more than just this stanza AND hold back her laughter...But it was all for naught! We started snickering, then progressed to giggling and then openly just laughed! Oh my Mother was such a delight and her choice of words were always fun, creative and PERFECT! So much so that she, my mom such a talented tween, entered that Logan Herald Journal Creative Writing Contest and emerged Victor of Cache Valley! The gold plated cuff links, the ones she so desperately wanted for her Father, were a timeless symbol of the appreciation and love she felt for her Dad and it was a gift her Father always treasured!
So if you are suffering from writer's block, which obviously I am, take a page from my book and get out of your funk by writing about someone who was wonderfully and innately skilled at...well...writing!